Wycombe v Scunthorpe United

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

Football League Two

Wycombe :
Talia, Senda, Easton, Nethercott, Johnson (sent off 75), Uhlenbeek, Ryan, Bloomfield, Stonebridge, Claridge (Williamson 78), Tyson (Dixon 45)
Subs not used:
Silk, Perpetuini, Martin

Scunthorpe United :
Musselwhite, Byrne, Sharp (Ridley 73), Crosby, Angus, Taylor (Keogh 45), Sparrow, Kell, Beagrie, Torpey, Walters (Hayes 59)
Subs not used:
Evans, Jackson

SULSESC REPORT

by The Inspector at Adams Park

THE Inspector was having an enjoyable half-term break away from the nice girlies at the most pleasant Public School where he is currently employed on a part-time basis. Having pruned quite severely one of the trees in his garden on the Monday, he felt full of hope and confidence on the Tuesday and went off in search of a new car, prior to arriving at what was Adams Park and what is now the Causeway Stadium. On his arrival, he was invited to write the match report for the above fixture by the illustrious A. Skeels Esq. The Inspector rarely declines such an invitation to display his literary skills and incisive comments on the proceedings, so here goes!

“We was crap” just about sums up the evening’s fayre. A more incompetent first-half performance would be hard to imagine, as Claridge and Tyson scored without much difficulty against a defence which had gone walkabout, the otherwise steady Angus being responsible for the second. Byrne seemed uncertain and hesitant throughout and it was from his flank that the first goal was scored.

The half-time team talk must have been harsh – it needed to be! – and the Iron did look more interested after the break. The Inspector felt that any point gained would be akin to the raising of Lazarus.

Subs. came on aplenty and once a Chairboys’ central defender had been sent off for raising an arm to Torpey, Sparrow did manage to net one.

HÈlas, chers enfants, trop peu, trop tard. On n’a rien mÈritÈ et c’est exactement ce qu’on a eu – rien du tout! Putain de merde! L’inspecteur Ètait confiant avant le match qu’on prendrait au moins un point, sinon trois. Mais, si on ne joue pas bien, peut-Ítre qu’on ne mÈrite rien.

Qu’est-ce qui s’est passÈ rÈcemment? Pourquoi un tel dÈclin? RÈflechissez, chers lecteurs – dÈbut dÈcembre on Ètait en tÍte de la division de sept points!